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Posts Tagged ‘wisdom’

… they’re working out in an EVEN BETTER way.

There is only one reason why something wouldn’t work out the way you wanted it to and that’s if there was something EVEN BETTER making its way towards you.

Sometimes we get caught up in pushing our agenda forward. But if something is not coming together the way you want, there’s always a reason…

It could be that it’s not yet time for it to work.

It could be that one or more of the parties involved are not yet ready for it to work.

Or it might just be that there’s an outcome that you’ve not yet considered that would be EVEN BETTER for you.

Regardless, if something isn’t working out the way you’d hoped, it’s critical that you STEP BACK and know that it’s for your higher good and that a better outcome is just around the corner.

It’s not up to you to make something work, it’s only up to you to allow what is meant to work make its way to you.

Stop thinking you have all the RIGHT ANSWERS and start trusting in the universe to deliver you to all the RIGHT PLACES. You might be pleasantly surprised to find out where it brings you.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… will definitely drive you insane.

How could it not?

What we don’t realize is that if we want something to be different, we have to do something differently — otherwise nothing changes.

There are no coincidences in life. If something is showing up again, it is a pattern that needs to be worked through, NOT repeated; so the universe obliges and gives you yet another opportunity to work through the same pattern in a DIFFERENT way.

How will you respond this time is the question?

Coming to the SAME conclusions and engaging in the SAME behaviors will keep you stuck in the SAME cycle of learning.

Break the pattern and chains that bind you. Identify the pattern that is showing up and show up differently in response to it. If you don’t like the outcomes you’ve been receiving, show up differently, take different actions and watch your outcomes naturally differ.

Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result is truly the definition of insanity. Learn to accept responsibility for you life. Learn to recognize your patterns and stop them in their tracks. Patterns are meant to be worked through, NEVER repeated. When you are ready to stop driving yourself crazy, a new life is ready to begin for you. What are you waiting for?

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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… keeps you both in darkness.

Why not learn to throw down a ladder instead?

There is a difference between trying to help someone and losing yourself in the process.

You can’t change people. You can’t fix people. You can’t drag people to a better version of themselves. They have to want to meet you there or they will never get there.

You can’t do the work for people. Giving them all the answers doesn’t help them to learn how to crawl out of the hole themselves. What happens the next time they fall in again?

Show them there is a better way to live. Throw them down a ladder and encourage them to climb out themselves. Lead by example. Stay out in the sunshine and entice them out of their darkness. But stay away from the edge, you might just fall in. If you try to do their work for them, you’ll both end up in the hole and then you won’t be of any use to them.

If you really want to help people, teach them how to work their way back up to the light. Give them the tools to help them climb out on their own and welcome them out into the sunshine. It’s a win-win for both of you.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

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… keeps you from being REAL.

Superficiality keeps you on the surface of your life. It prevents you from going deeper emotionally. It keeps you from establishing deeper connections in your relationships with others and subsequently with yourself.

Being superficial is a way of guarding yourself against intimacy, vulnerability and emotional pain. After all, if you never go deeply, how deeply can you get hurt?

Superficial relationships are easy — they require nothing more than pleasantries and social graces. But superficial relationships are never fulfilling; they don’t feed and nurture the soul. They leave you feeling vacant and empty. They are never deep enough to penetrate the heart, so they never evolve you. They are just predicated on ego interests (conditional love, physical attraction, sex, money, status, education, career, labels, etc…).

Real relationships transform you — they change you, they force you to grow, they breathe life into you and make you real. They require emotional depth and vulnerability. They force you to go deeper into yourself and unlock your demons. Ultimately they break your heart open so you can hold more love. They make you better. But to get there you have to first penetrate the realm of the heart (unconditional love, selflessness, acceptance, non-judgment, openness, vulnerability, etc…).

Superficial relationships are easy, but anything just handed to you is NEVER worth having. Real relationships are more challenging, they push you outside your comfort zone, they force you to face those demons and go deeper into yourself and your relations with others.

Superficiality isn’t just about being fake or shallow, it’s about guarding yourself from pain and hurt. Are you ready to do the work to be in a real relationship or are you contented to accept what’s on the surface? When you are ready to go deeper, you will unearth the real treasures that await you.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

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… loves WITHOUT conditions.

Anything else is conditional love which is predicated on meeting specific conditions…

Are they educated? check.

Are they the right age? check.

Are they the right body weight? check.

Do they make enough money? check.

Do they have the right social standing? check.

Will they make me look good in public? check.

But what if they didn’t tick these boxes? What then? What if you loved them anyway? Now there’s a dilemma.

But here’s what you need to know…

Conditional love is superficial. Unconditional love is eternal.

Conditional love falls apart when the conditions cease to exist. Unconditional love is free to grow because it’s not predicated on a condition.

Conditional love is choked by it’s own expectations. Unconditional love doesn’t have expectations, but remains open and hopeful.

Conditional love is about “ticking all the boxes.” Unconditional love abandons all requirements.

Conditional love looks to have all its needs met. Unconditional love looks to meet all needs.

Conditional love is selfish, self-centered and unilateral. Unconditional love is selfless and giving.

Conditional love is emotionally immature. Unconditional love is built on maturity and wisdom.

Conditional love is rigid and doesn’t like to take risks. Unconditional love is flexible and lives outside its comfort zone.

Conditional love suffocates under self-imposed rules. Unconditional love is freeing and knows no boundaries.

Conditional love is what you think you want. Unconditional love is what you never knew you wanted.

Unconditional love sneaks up on you — it shows up through a back door while you are at the front door waiting for something else.

Unconditional love is what was standing in front of you all along while you were busy ticking all your boxes and evaluating all your options.

Unconditional love is usually “the one that got away” while you were busy searching out the perfect conditions for it.

Unconditional love loves unconditionally. Anything else just doesn’t cut it. Ask yourself — how do you love?

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

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… walk away with love.

ALWAYS with love.

Our lives consist of many different types of relationships, but not every one of those relationships is meant to be in your life forever. And even those that are, seldom make it there, unfortunately.

Not everyone will understand you and support who you are. Not everyone will appreciate you and not take you for granted. Not everyone will make time for you. Not everyone will be able to communicate with you. Not everyone will recognize the beauty in your relationship until it’s too late. And certainly not everyone will recognize what they have lost until they have truly lost it. That’s generally how it works.

And some people NEVER learn but remain comfortable in their patterns — forever blaming their patterns for why they cannot move forward. And forever repeating those patterns in hopes that one day they find the “magic person” who can fix it for them. But that never works.

Relationships aren’t important for where they bring you to, they are only important for how they have changed you.

If people you are involved with cannot see the value of what you bring to the table, then they do not get to have you.

But love them anyway.

Love them because they taught you so much about yourself. Love them because they helped shape your heart and open your mind. Love them because they unveiled your hidden pain and your fears so you could work on them. Love them because they taught you what you do and DO NOT want to experience in a relationship. Love them because it is that love that will transform you. And finally love them, because if you don’t, you will just carry the scars of that hurt forward into your next relationship. And you deserve better than that.

When people can’t appreciate what they have in you, don’t fight them, quietly disappear from their lives, and take that love with you. When you leave with love, you leave with all the learning that made you BETTER. You are the one who wins. Let that love transform you on your path forward and happily open you up to a new tomorrow.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… casts you onto their stage.

And you don’t need to be on their stage.

Everyone has a story and drama queens’ stories tend to be intense, erratic and exhausting. They’re needing a different type of connection to you which they’re currently not getting, so they create a type of drama in order to elicit it from you.

Sometimes they create drama in romantic relationships as a means of getting your attention if they are feeling a lack of connection/emotion/communication, etc..

Sometimes they create drama at work or other situations as a means of distraction away from something they do NOT want YOU to see or a distraction away from something THEY do NOT want to see. Sometimes they do it to distract themselves away from doing their own personal work.

And sometimes they create drama just so that they can feel some type of aliveness energy. They tend to be very passionate people who need to feel and if the situation isn’t giving them a rush, they might create some type of drama so that they can feel some sort of exhilaration.

But regardless, drama queens own their stage and you don’t need to be on it. Life is too short to be living out someone else’s drama. Recognize when the drama is starting and learn to exit stage left as quickly as possible.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

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