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Posts Tagged ‘transforming pain’

… but not mandatory, for growth.

The only constant we have in life is change. We are only here to grow through experiences and to learn who we really are which is aspects of the creator (God).

The nature of reality is change. As long as we are alive on this planet, our lives need to continually expand and evolve and transformation is a critical part of that growth.

Everyone wants to be transformed, but not everyone wants to do the work to transform an aspect of their life. Most prefer to stay stuck and stagnant in a situation that has outlived it’s purpose.

There are 2 ways in which as humans, we can transform. We can transform in a “good” way or a “bad” way. Good and bad are just human labels to describe a process of transformation; they are not realities.

The fact is that we are always in control of how we grow. In the “good” way, we can get out ahead of the curve and recognize that we are feeling stuck/stagnant in our lives and push ourselves outside our comfort zone to make some sort of change.

But many of us tend to evolve and transform in a “bad” way which is awaiting the universe to come from behind us and push us outside our comfort zone via a crisis which undoubtedly pushes us towards transformation. 

Either way, you will transform — either on your timeline or the universe’s. Crisis are critical, but not mandatory. How do you choose to evolve?

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

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If you would like more information on Intuitive Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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the-only-way-out-is-through… is through.

You NEVER overcome your problems by abandoning your path. You only succeed by seeing it through.

In life it doesn’t matter what you are going through, it only matters that you get yourself through it. Getting through it teaches you about yourself – it gives you a new set of tools to learn how to live your life. And once learned, that set of tools will forever pave the way to a happier and more fulfilling existence for you.

The truth is that you can never hide from your pain. It is always there, but you have a choice as to how you can deal with it. If you succumb to the pain, it will always win, but if you stand up to it, it will never be able to stop you.

Running from your problems NEVER solves them. Trying to avoid the pain only delays the inevitable. The only way to get to the other side is to brave your way through the lesson, the hardship and the pain. It may not be the popular response, but it is the only constructive response. Once you can move beyond the painful experience, that experience is free to shift for you and the sun comes out again.

Sitting out on the grass in the pouring rain only gets you wet. Crying about it will not keep you dry, but if you get up off the grass and run towards shelter, you have half a chance of staying dry. You cannot think your way through your pain, you have to get up and take action in order for things to change. The only way out is through. Are you ready to go through it all to get to the other side? Your ability to heal is contingent on it.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s new Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

If you would like more information on Emotional Wellbeing and Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to read some reviews on Donnalynn’s Coachingclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here. 

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images… is the ONLY way to reveal the good.

Believe it or not, there is NO bad. There is only our perception of bad that makes it real for us.

Any event we may perceive as “bad” in our lives only happens in order to bring us to a better place. All challenges and obstacles whether it be job loss, loss of a loved one, bankruptcy, illness, etc… are purely illusions put in our way so that we can learn how to be strong in ourselves and strive to make our lives better because of it. So bad is a catalyst for good – but only if you rise to the challenge and overcome it. If you choose to buy into the bad, you can make it yours for all of eternity and wear it as a jaded badge of honor. But why would you do that?

Bad is only present until you do the work on transforming it. Then bad becomes the highest version of good you could have ever dreamed up for yourself. It is the way the universe works. It doesn’t matter what has happened to you in your childhood or as an adult, your work is to make your life better because of having had those experiences. When you make positive change for yourself, not only does your life improve, but you inspire others to do the same.

When you consciously choose to break bad, the universe always conspires with you to bring you to the most optimal outcome of good. But when you unconsciously continue to accept the bad that is hurled at you and begin to identify with it everyday, the universe will continue to throw you more bad in the form of lessons until you finally succeed in burying yourself beneath a shroud of depression and sadness.

Are you ready to break bad? Your life is waiting to get good. Let’s start transforming it. You will be rewarded every step of the way.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s new Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

If you would like more information on Emotional Wellbeing and Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to read some reviews on Donnalynn’s Coachingclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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tumblr_static_it-is-what-it-is… and it is ALWAYS going to be OK.

That is the only thing you ever need to remember in life. Whatever happens…  it is ALL going to be OK.

We are so quick to judge events in our lives as good or bad. If it gets labeled “good,” it’s time to go out and celebrate, and if it is labeled “bad,” we can easily fall into a dark space feeling somewhat victimized.

The difference between these two states is purely perception. All events in our lives are relatively equal in their capacity to teach us a lesson and mold us into smarter, wiser and more balanced human beings. But indeed, most of our best learning opportunities are experiences that have challenged us.

Don’t judge a situation as good or bad. Once it has been labeled by you, your perception creates your own reality. An event is just that – an event. You are the one who deems it positive or negative and then you will be the only one experiencing the fallout of your own perception.

The wise say, “When you are going through hell, just KEEP GOING.” Don’t stop and label it as hell and allow yourself to suffer. Just keep pushing through it and before you know it, you will come out the other side where the sun is shining. The sun never goes in. It is always out in some part of the world. Just like in life, the sun never sets on us, but we tend to want to wallow in pity and pain and as a result we drag ourselves into long, dark tunnels.

You are in control of whether or not you allow yourself to get stuck in a dark tunnel. Everything is what it is – and it is ALWAYS going to be OK however you decide to label it. So make it easier on yourself. Remember that you are never alone. You are supremely taken care of. There is a divine force in place that is guiding you towards learning and once we realize that our darkness is attributed to our own perceptions, then we can allow the sun to come out again.

Any event is what it is, but it will ALWAYS become what you make of it. 

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s new Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

If you would like more information on Emotional Wellbeing and Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to read some reviews on Donnalynn’s Coachingclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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images-1

…stop digging.

After all, it’s not really going to lift you out of that hole, is it? A hole takes you deeper. Once you realize that, it is easier to make another choice for yourself.

We have a tendency to prove our own undoing. We dig ourselves into our own emotional holes. Every time we choose to dwell on negative emotions, we choose to dig that hole deeper. Every time we choose to buy into other’s criticisms of us, we dig ourselves deeper even still. In fact, it is very easy to bury ourselves beneath a shroud of negative emotion, insecurity and inferiority.

You have a choice everyday as to whether you will allow your negative state of emotions to affect you. You also have a choice as to whether you will allow other people’s negative state of emotions affect you. When dealing with others, it is important to remember that those emotions, criticisms and critiques are not yours, so why own them? You NEVER need to accept any of that as fodder to help you dig yourself deeper. It’s simply not necessary.

No one is digging that hole for you, but YOU. If you are in too deep, it is time to throw away the shovel and climb back out. Decide today that you choose NOT to be buried by your own or other’s negative rhetoric. You choose happiness and freedom from negative thought. Your life is yours. At some point, you must come to the conclusion that you are done beating yourself up. You deserve better. Once you can see that, the shovel no longer looks attractive. Trade in your shovel for new soil that will promise to grow you tomorrow’s abundance.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s new Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

If you would like more information on Emotional Wellbeing and Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to read some reviews on Donnalynn’s Coachingclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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Unknown… learn to be flexible.

Learn to let things wash over you.

When we try to resist hardship, change, pain or heartbreak, we make it harder then it needs to be. Don’t fight the experience, learn to let it wash over you and leave you.

Many of us attach to the hardship, we personalize it and over-dramatize it and create bigger obstacles then need to be surmounted. Negative energy builds upon itself. If you want to create a monster, you can. What you resist, persists, but what you learn to look at disappears.

Be flexible, learn to navigate life with ease and grace no matter what is going on around you and you will ALWAYS have a better result. The slight and fragile blade of grass is still standing after a great storm, but the tall, resistant oak tree will be snapped in half. Strength does not guarantee success but the ability to yield to trouble allows you more options for survival. In the middle of the storm, bending and yielding buys you time until the sun comes out. If you resist, you will always be snapped in half… and Game Over.

Let each storm pass through you and as it does it will teach you something about yourself. It changes you and you find that you truly learn how to weather the storm. In life, don’t resist the inevitable… power through it, allow it to pass through you over and over again until the storm stops. When all is said and done, you will be the one left standing.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s new Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

If you would like more information on Emotional Wellbeing and Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to read some reviews on Donnalynn’s Coachingclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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…what you look at disappears.

In life, we fail to realize that everything is energy. When you do not want to have a specific experience because you deem it negative, you resist that experience. That action of resistance is a firm and decisive action that tells the universe, NO. But what we are not seeing is that it does not alleviate the experience you are having. It only brings more “NO” to your door. By resisting something, you are putting the energy of NO out into the universe.

For example, if you do not want to feel emotional pain from a relationship and you fight the experience you are having because you cannot surrender to the pain and transform it, then you only manage to perpetuate the pain you are feeling. And what is worse, you are putting out the sign on your front door saying, “No.” Again, that no does not stop your pain, but it will certainly put an end to good experiences that were coming your way. No simply attracts more NO – no happiness, no good fortune, no laughter, no new relationship, etc… No says means NO or nothing.

If we could learn to surrender to our life lessons and all experiences – both good and bad and not fight them, then we would remain open enough to invite the energy of “openness” or YES to the table. The sooner you can accept your situation and surrender to it’s greater lesson, the sooner that energy of YES will transform the situation and open you up to more positive experiences. Yes says, “I am open, I am willing, I would like to receive.”

Surrender to your experience and allow whatever is going to be, to be. Remember, what you resist, persists (and by doing so encourages the energy of NO). What you look at disappears (and by doing so transforms all experiences into YES). It is, by definition, always your choice.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s new Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

If you would like more information on Emotional Wellbeing and Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to read some reviews on Donnalynn’s Coachingclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here. 

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