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Posts Tagged ‘relationships’

… it’s in learning what that person came to teach you. 

But no one ever teaches us that.

Why do we make it all about the other person? It doesn’t matter what that person does to you or what that person says to you/doesn’t say to you — however unpleasant the circumstances may be. It only matters what you learn from that person and how you make your life BETTER because of them.

We tend to get caught up in the drama-trauma zone of our lives and we become the victims of what others do/say to us. But it can never be about them. Our lives are ABOUT US and if those people are in our lives, we should only be interested in the affect their presence has over us. 

When we learn that no one has control over our lives unless we give it, everything shifts for us. 

Remember in life, it’s never about a person, they are just the relationship villain in place to teach you something about yourself. It’s about what you take away from that person that makes all the difference in the world. Get the lesson and get out; make your life better because they were in it. 

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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… they see you for who THEY are.

People come fully equipped with their own filters through which they are able to perceive you. This means they might not be able to see the REAL YOU, they see a version of you through their own lens.

No need to get upset about the version of you that they see. It is irrelevant. If they are not clearly able to see the truth of themselves, they will never be able to honor the truth within you.

You don’t need to be accepted by people who cannot see themselves. All you can do is be yourself. Put your energy into honoring your truth, not trying to change theirs. People don’t see you for who you are, they only see you for WHO THEY ARE. If you’re not aligned with the vibration they hold, they will NEVER see you; and for you, that’s a good thing. Misalignment is your indication that you are moving up the vibrational scale and they are falling away. Thank them for the clarity.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… who can’t see an issue in their behavior.

Not everyone is conscious. Not everyone has the ability to see how their actions affect others. If you have to tell someone over and over again that they’re hurting you, they are unable to process your pain, most likely because they haven’t processed their own. 

In order for them to honor your feelings, they first have to look at themselves in the mirror and accept responsibility for how they’ve made you feel. But for many, that reflection can be very painful and bring up other past failures. No one wants to feel responsible for hurting someone else and no one wants to feel like a failure; it’s much easier to just shut down and become defensive — “let me prove to you that I don’t need to change, you do.”

If someone is truly evolved, they know they are not responsible for how you feel, BUT they will always have a degree of empathy for your feelings and will always be able to honor them in whatever way they can. 

If they can’t hear your pain, you’ll never be able to get them to honor it. If you’re trying to communicate your feelings and they’re being defensive, walk away, sometimes silence can be the greatest teacher. If your words aren’t enough to help them hear you, then stop talking and give them the time and space to hear what you have already said.

You can’t change people who can’t see an issue in their behavior. You can’t get anyone to stop hurting you until they come face to face with their own pain. If they cannot change themselves, how are you ever going to change them? Life is too short to try and teach unconscious people how to honor your feelings. Walk away and in time the universe will deliver you someone who can honor your heart.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… it only hurts the betrayer.

Ironic, but true.

To be betrayed is the greatest gift because it shows you someone’s true colors. But as humans, we get caught up in the drama of the betrayal. But in reality, it never matters WHY you were betrayed, or HOW you were betrayed, what matters is that you identify the betrayer. That person is NOT true to you nor do they hold your best interests. In the long run, that is much more valuable information.

Betrayal is a morality game. And by virtue of the fact that one betrays another, the karmic debt rests on their shoulders.

The betrayed can walk away with a clean conscience assuming they’re innocent. The betrayer must live with their actions and the consequences of which always carry a karmic price tag, not to mention the regret of deceit weighs heavily on the soul.

If you’ve been betrayed, don’t spend your energy trying to justify yourself or your situation and don’t feel victimized. Know you deserve better and pick your head up high and keep walking. The betrayer may have gotten what they wanted in the short run, but in the long run, the betrayed always wins because they now know who they will NEVER TRUST AGAIN and that alone is worth its weight in gold.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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… it’s ALWAYS the beginning of something new.

It has to be.

One door can’t close without another one opening. Everything is energy and that energy doesn’t just go away; it needs to be redirected. Energy doesn’t just stop; it transitions into something else. 

Endings must always lead somewhere new because life is cyclical and change is constant. Nothing ever stays the same. The seeds of what’s ending always fertilize a new beginning. So the question is never “what have I lost” it is “what will I create next?”

An ending is never an ending, it’s always the beginning of something new. Your work is not to lament the ending, but to focus on creating a new and better beginning.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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… but because you do.

We have the wrong idea about forgiveness… we think it’s something we give to others, but really, it’s a gift we give to ourselves. 

When you leave a situation or relationship angry or resentful, you are NOT free. It takes so much energy to harbor anger and resentment and it keeps you trapped there. But when you leave a situation or relationship with love and gratitude, you are free to move forward into your future.

Animosity keeps you trapped. Forgiveness sets you free. Forgiveness isn’t something you give to another; it’s something you give to yourself. Being free of attachment to another is the greatest gift we can give to ourselves.

When relationships end, let them go. Don’t hold onto the pain and hurt. Forgive. Not because they deserve your forgiveness, but because you do. You deserve to be happy and pain free. Forgiveness is one step closer to getting there.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here. 

 

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… walk away from it.

At least for little while.

Then the answer becomes clear.

Pushing for answers doesn’t bring them quicker, it just highlights the questions.

You get what you focus on and if you’re obsessively focusing on the uncertainty, it creates more uncertainty. Clarity can only be found in a clear space and a clear space can only be found when all inquiries cease.

The best way to find clarity and to make decisions is to align with yourself get out of your head and into your heart. Stop mentally projecting outside of yourself for answers and ask yourself how you feel in every experience.

Life speaks to you through your experiences. Don’t focus on finding the answers. Live your life. It has every answer you will ever need. 

Overthinking creates mental clutter. Living your life and feeling your way through your life brings solutions. With every experience you evolve and you intuitively learn where you need to be. Answers can never be artificially found outside of you, they have to be found inside you. If you can’t solve it, walk away from it and the answers will become clear.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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