When a Relationship Ends

… you are supposed to MOVE ON.

It doesn’t matter how or why it ends, it only matters that you acknowledge the ending and take the learning with you.

Relationships are opportunities for us to grow and learn. When you learn what you have needed to learn from each other, then the relationship ends. It is time to start a new chapter to practice your learning in a new situation.

Now, that does NOT mean that the relationship will never come back to you in a newer, healed form later on. But it does tell you that for now, your work with each other is complete.

Problems arise when we do not let go of the relationship, but hold on out of fear of need or fear of being alone. When you hold on too long, it only creates frustration, pain and stagnation and ultimately will keep all happiness and growth from you.

When a relationship ends, the most important thing you can do is to be strong and learn to graciously accept the new changes. Trust in the universe to bring you to where you need to be. If your relationship was not meant to end, it wouldn’t be ending. If it is ending, it is because it is time for it to do so.

Don’t drive your relationship into the ground by holding on too long. Everything happens for a reason and despite the fact that you may feel it is not yet time for your relationship to be ending, the universe may just have other plans for you. Learn to trust and learn to find the “good” in “goodbye,” for it is ALWAYS there.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s new Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

If you would like more information on Emotional Wellbeing and Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.

If you would like to read some reviews on Donnalynn’s Coaching, click here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Read Full Post »

It’s Complicated

… but it shouldn’t be.

Relationships aren’t complicated, we complicate them. If I had a dime for every client who told me that their relationship was “complicated,” I would be a billionaire. Why so complicated? Well for starters, we always stay for the wrong reasons…

How do you know if a relationship is really right for you? You first need to be brutally honest with yourself and in doing so, you will be honest with your partner. Honesty is simple, but we hide from it. We don’t always want the answers that it yields.

If you are telling yourself you are in a “complicated relationship,” you need to answer these two honest questions about your relationship:

1. Are you getting what YOU truly need/want?
2. Are you giving your partner what THEY truly need/want?

Be honest with yourself, it is not just about what you are getting/receiving but what you are giving to your partner that is just as important. Relationships work both ways. If you definitively answer NO to either one or both questions, then all bets off. The relationship you are in, is not working for either of you (at the moment). It is important to realize that you can love someone but still not be right for them and vice-versa. It only becomes complicated when we choose to stay and force our expectations on them.

Don’t try and change people, don’t resent them for not being what you need them to be. Let people be who they are and if who they are doesn’t work for you, then love them enough to let them go.  Let them find the person that is best for them.

Staying for the wrong reasons never yields you the outcome you desire. It only frustrates the situation. Know yourself, know your heart, know your dreams and know your partner, then you can make the most mature decision for both of you.

Sometimes you need to lose to win. Don’t strangle-hold your relationship until it becomes what you want. You only end up killing it. If you give it a little space and allow each partner to heal, you may just find that you get either a better version of that relationship after it heals or you get a better relationship with someone else. Either way, you win by losing what did not work.

All relationships require some degree of work, but at the end of the day, a relationship either works or it doesn’t… but it should never-ever be “complicated.”

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s new Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

If you would like more information on Emotional Wellbeing and Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynn, click here.

If you would like to read some reviews on Donnalynn’s Coaching, click here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Read Full Post »