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Archive for the ‘Peace’ Category

… will only disappoint you.

We all have our own baseline expectations of how people should behave in given situations BUT expecting people to uphold those expectations is both unrealistic and unfair to everyone.

It’s ok to have high standards for personal decorum, but it’s not ok to put those standards on others.

Putting those standards on others sets them up to fail and sets you up to be disappointed. Let people be who they are and IF WHO THEY ARE DOESN’T WORK FOR YOU – MAKE ANOTHER DECISION, but don’t waste one moment hoping/expecting they’ll show up differently.

Expecting people to be other than who they are is a game you’ll NEVER win. It only sets you up for disappointment when they don’t come through. Recognize that you can’t fix people and you can’t change them, but you can learn to accept them for who they are and LET THEM OFF THE HOOK for everything they cannot be for you. 

People are messy and they come with their own limitations. Don’t get caught up in those limitations – they’ll only frustrate you. Remember that it isn’t your job to hold up a mirror to their lack of self-awareness. If they cannot see themselves, there isn’t anyway you’re going to be able to show them who they are.

Learn to know the cards you are holding – learn to know the person who is sitting right across from you and NEVER EXPECT THEM TO BE OTHER THAN WHO THEY ARE and you’ll never be disappointed.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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… take LONGER in the end.

There are no shortcuts to your own life experience.

Life builds onto itself everyday with every new experience and EVERY NEW EXPERIENCE IS NEEDED TO MOVE ONTO THE NEXT PHASE OF YOUR LIFE. 

Your life is a step-by-step amalgamation of your experiences, so if you don’t explore the wisdom of the phase you’re currently in, YOU’LL NEVER MOVE ON IN YOUR LIFE.

Don’t try to shortchange yourself by taking a shortcut, it’ll just leave you empty-handed and stuck in the same place. If you’re not moving forward in your life, ask yourself if you’ve sufficiently cleaned out your emotional attic? Every experience we have comes with its own attic we’d rather not open.

Think about it, you can’t renovate your upstairs if you still haven’t cleaned out your attic. If you don’t learn from and let go of old experiences, how can you move forward and build a new living situation for yourself? You can’t.

Shortcuts may seem like a great idea in the short run, but in the long run they leave you at a dead-end. Don’t look for the easy way out. The easy way out is just that — EASY, it’s NEVER better. 

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER,click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

 

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… you’re NOT ready to leave it.

Obviously there’s something there for you that has yet to be uncovered.

If you’re trying to move forward, but can’t, it’s important to recognize that you’re being held back for a reason. There’s something in the place where you currently stand that requires your attention — there’s a learning there for you — there’s a lesson there that needs to be integrated before you can move onto the next stage.

The process of being held back is quite purposeful because your path builds onto itself and each stage of life entails prerequisite learning. Therefore, if you haven’t internalized a lesson at a given stage, you’ll be prevented from moving onto the next stage.

What are you not seeing? What are you not looking at? It’s usually something that you’ve shoved away in a closet with resolve never to open. Rest assured that your life will not let you move forward until you open it and do the work on moving past it. 

If you’re stuck in the same place, you’re not ready to leave it. You may WANT to leave it, but you lack the learning necessary to move forward. The universe will always protect you from moving onto a stage until you have the tools to deal with it. Don’t spend your time being frustrated, spend it cleaning out your closets. Skeletons don’t go away, they’ll only haunt you until you pull them out of your closet — then they are just a pile of bones.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… it’s about how you choose to REACT to it.

Your reactions are what make it REAL for you. In essence, nothing can be real until you react to its presence in your life.

Reacting is a just a way of solidifying a situation. Think about it… a situation is just a situation, how you react to that situation will determine your next experience. This is because your reaction sets into motion a set of circumstances that generate a given outcome. So if you react positively, you get a positive outcome. If you react negatively, you get a negative outcome. If you don’t react at all, the outcome is undetermined; it’s awaiting your response.

Think before you react. Your personal reaction will set off a chain reaction of events in your life. Ask yourself how you want a situation to play out and then act accordingly, not unconsciously.

A conscious action has a better chance of yielding a desired outcome. An unconscious reaction will almost guarantee an unfulfilled outcome.   

Life isn’t about what happens to you. It’s only about your reaction to it. Because your reaction is what makes it real for you. Next time something happens, how will you react?

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.
Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

 

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… keeps you questioning.

We all push for immediate answers to our most pressing concerns, but answers don’t work that way — they only come in their own time.

Answers on your path are a natural progression of your experience. Solutions cannot be given before you are ready to receive them. You’re not looking for a perfect solution, you’re looking to evolve yourself through step by step experiences. The joy isn’t in a future promise; it’s hidden within in this moment.

Answers are given when you’re ready to enter a new phase. If you don’t have the answer, it’s because you’re not yet ready to move forward, there’s learning in the space where you are right now. Stay there — enjoy it — live it — it has something for you. When you are ready, your experience will give you every answer you need to move in the direction that is right for you. When you grow, you know.

Don’t beat yourself up for not having all the answers. Life isn’t about having all the answers, it’s about making the best decision you can in this moment based on the experience you have so far.

You cannot know where you are going until you are there. Pushing for answers doesn’t bring them sooner — it just highlights the uncertainty. You can run yourself in circles demanding an answer or you can trust the process of your life to bring you to the answer once you are ready to receive it.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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is about controlling your thoughts, NOT your actions.

Those of us who want to feel in control usually default to controlling our actions in the hopes of controlling an outcome. But there’s a better way to get the outcome you desire…

Start at the beginning — learn to control your thoughts FIRST because your thoughts create your perceptions and your perceptions create your reality.

Nothing will manifest through action if it’s not supported by a thought that’s aligned with it. In other words, if you think one thing but try and use action to create something else, it’ll never work. For example, have you ever tried to succeed in a business venture, yet didn’t believe in yourself that you could succeed? That’s a perfect example.

If your action doesn’t support what you think about it, it’ll never happen. There’s no amount of action that will overcome your thought about the situation. It doesn’t matter what you do, what matters is what you think about it.

Don’t fight yourself — if you want to control something, control something that’ll make a difference in your life. Don’t waste your time trying to control something physically through your actions and yet undue yourself mentally through your thoughts.

Do you want to be in control of your life? Learn to control the right things. Control your thoughts and it’ll control everything else.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

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… doesn’t MAKE it work.

It just exhausts you.

There is only so much you can do to make a situation or a relationship work. At some point you have to be willing to walk away from it if it is not meeting your needs. In other words, you have to learn WHEN to walk away from what is NOT working, so you can free up the space to find what will.

You can’t repeatedly look at what’s not working and resent it for not being different.

It’s not others’ fault for not meeting your needs, it’s your fault for allowing them to continually disappoint you.

Don’t look to change others. Look to change yourself. If you are not getting your needs met, look somewhere else. Don’t make someone responsible for your happiness, take charge of it yourself.

Holding on to what doesn’t work, doesn’t make it work. It just breaks you down and takes your power away from you. Love yourself enough to ask for better and you just might get it.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

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