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Archive for the ‘Letting Go’ Category

… determines how you move forward.

In life, the way you leave relationships and situations determines the lasting influence they will have over you.

Do you walk away angry or resentful? If so, you’re still attached to that person/situation; you’re not emotionally free. Harboring negative emotions keeps you bound to the very person/situation you are trying to escape.

Do you leave with understanding and compassion? If so, you are beginning to cultivate a degree of detachment from the scenario that has you bound.

It’s all about how you let go. If you let go with negative emotions, those emotions keep you stuck reliving the drama and keeping the pain alive — it keeps reminding you that there’s no resolution.

If you can start looking at the constructive reasons for letting go and the ways it benefits you, you’ll be released from the clutches of attachment and begin to free yourself from the pain of the past.

How you leave things determines how you move forward… Don’t hold onto the pain of the past, you will only carry it with you. Learn to let go with love and that love will transform every new encounter you have.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… your life KEEPS YOU unhappy.

It’s a vicious cycle.

Nothing and no one will bring you joy because your happiness can NEVER be found OUTSIDE OF YOU.

Happiness is an inside job but as humans, we project our need for happiness outside of us. We sit and wait for something to make us happy…

If I could just get that new job, I’ll be happy.

If I could just get that promotion, I’d be happy.

If I could just get the raise, I’d be happy.

If I could just close the deal, I’d be happy.

And so on…

But here’s the irony… no lasting happiness can be found outside of you — it’s fleeting. Once you get something you want, there will undoubtedly be something else that you’ll want in order to be happy. You’ll always want more therefore you’ll always end up chasing happiness. 

Start learning to change the way you are looking at things — when you learn to find the best in ANY situation, you’ll find the happiness it has for you. Every moment of your life offers you a small gift of happiness if you are conscious enough to see it.

But our tendency is to only look at things at face value — is it good or baddoes it makes me happy or sad? But life isn’t black or white — happiness exists in the shades of grey. And those shades are waiting to be defined each and every day by YOU.

When you are unhappy with your life, your life keeps you unhappy — it will continue to bring you situations that match your unhappy vibration. Happiness is an inside job — find any reason to be happy and let it raise your vibration. Like attracts like. When you learn to find ANY reason to be happy, the universe will bring you EVERY reason to be happy. 

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… can bring you somewhere new.

Fighting against it, will keep you stuck in it.

Resistance gets you nowhere. What you resists, persists — what you look at disappears. If you’re trying to run from something, it’ll forever have a hold over you. If you can accept it, you can move beyond it. 

Fighting against something keeps it alive in your experience, but accepting it can free up mental/emotional space to help you set your sights elsewhere to create something new. Once you accept the reality, you are free to transform it. 

Don’t spend your time fighting against what you don’t want. Accept that you are where you are in your life (for whatever reason got you there) and now make some new decisions to move into a new direction that better suits you.

Don’t lament where you are in your life. Experience brought you there and acceptance will free you — resistance keeps you trapped. Fighting with your demons keeps you embroiled in a battle with them. Make friends with those demons so that they step aside and let you move on with your life.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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…. it’s something you CREATE for yourself.

We’re so conditioned to expect something OUTSIDE of us to make us happy, but WAITING for something to make you happy will NEVER MAKE YOU HAPPY because happiness isn’t something you get, it’s something you create for yourself. It’s A STATE OF MIND which you, yourself, cultivate and once internally cultivated, it has the power to transform you.

You always have a choice as to the emotion you are experiencing. EMOTIONS ARE BORN OUT OF YOUR THOUGHTS. If you’re focusing on thoughts that support despair or negativity, you’re fostering unhappiness. But if you focus on thoughts that inspire you, YOU’LL NATURALLY CREATE A STATE OF HAPPINESS WITHIN. In other words, you’ll soon feel better because you’ve influenced your mind to do so.

Your thoughts dictate whether or not you’ll experience happiness. If you’re thinking a thought that is NOT making you happy, CHANGE IT until it does. And if it’s impossible to alter that thought, then shut it down and replace it with a thought that feels better to you. By creating a happier state of mind, the world relates to you differently — remember when you’re happy, the world smiles with you and when you’re sad, you cry alone. 

Happiness is your birthright. But you have to first learn to cultivate it from within. If you’re still waiting for external events outside of you to make you happy, you’ll be waiting an eternity. Don’t give your power over to any person or situation for your happiness. Take control of your thoughts and shift your emotions. When you learn to find ANY reason to be happy — you’ll have EVERY reason to be happy. 

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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… generally entails having a BREAKDOWN first. 

They usually work hand-in-hand.

Our greatest breakthroughs usually come after we’ve completely surrendered control over our lives.

You have to be willing to break down all your mental constructs and expectations of the way you think things should be and be open to a new way of seeing things that might be BETTER than you ever even imagined.

Once you’ve suffered a breakdown of a certain aspect of your life, you’ve learned to let it go. You no longer have any judgements or expectations of it being the way you needed it to be. You are now free to allow it to become anything it is meant to become for you.

Life has a funny way of working things out for you. You don’t always know what is right for you. If you’re breaking down over something, it wasn’t working for you and holding onto something that isn’t working, only keeps you trapped. Letting it go and letting it subsequently break you down is what will inevitably lead you to the breakthrough you’re seeking.

Breakdowns are hard, but the breakthroughs they lead you to are priceless.  Don’t avoid the breakdown, it’s in place to show you that YOU ARE ALMOST THERE. Just when you think it couldn’t get any darker, that’s the moment when the light returns. Don’t run from the breakdown, let it transform you and let it bring on the breakthrough you’ve been waiting for all along.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… will only disappoint you.

We all have our own baseline expectations of how people should behave in given situations BUT expecting people to uphold those expectations is both unrealistic and unfair to everyone.

It’s ok to have high standards for personal decorum, but it’s not ok to put those standards on others.

Putting those standards on others sets them up to fail and sets you up to be disappointed. Let people be who they are and IF WHO THEY ARE DOESN’T WORK FOR YOU – MAKE ANOTHER DECISION, but don’t waste one moment hoping/expecting they’ll show up differently.

Expecting people to be other than who they are is a game you’ll NEVER win. It only sets you up for disappointment when they don’t come through. Recognize that you can’t fix people and you can’t change them, but you can learn to accept them for who they are and LET THEM OFF THE HOOK for everything they cannot be for you. 

People are messy and they come with their own limitations. Don’t get caught up in those limitations – they’ll only frustrate you. Remember that it isn’t your job to hold up a mirror to their lack of self-awareness. If they cannot see themselves, there isn’t anyway you’re going to be able to show them who they are.

Learn to know the cards you are holding – learn to know the person who is sitting right across from you and NEVER EXPECT THEM TO BE OTHER THAN WHO THEY ARE and you’ll never be disappointed.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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… grats you more.

When you’re grateful for what you have, you’re rewarded with more of it. This is because your attention to the positive aspects of life draw onto you more of the same.

But nobody teaches us that.

We’re so goal oriented that the focus tends to stay on what we do not have rather than relish what we do have, and subsequently because our focus is on the lack of what we desire, we only succeed in creating more of it. 

You can’t get to what you want by focusing on what you don’t. Learn to practice gratitude for what you have and it’ll continue to bring more of the same. Like attracts like — happy and fulfilled always brings more happiness and fulfillment. How could it not?

Take back control over your thoughts. Focusing on what you don’t have doesn’t bring it quicker. It only keeps it from you. 

By practicing gratitude, it’ll grat you even more than you desire. It’s not about NOT having what you want, it’s about being grateful for what you have. 

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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