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Archive for the ‘Control Over Your Life’ Category

… generally entails having a BREAKDOWN first. 

They usually work hand-in-hand.

Our greatest breakthroughs usually come after we’ve completely surrendered control over our lives.

You have to be willing to break down all your mental constructs and expectations of the way you think things should be and be open to a new way of seeing things that might be BETTER than you ever even imagined.

Once you’ve suffered a breakdown of a certain aspect of your life, you’ve learned to let it go. You no longer have any judgements or expectations of it being the way you needed it to be. You are now free to allow it to become anything it is meant to become for you.

Life has a funny way of working things out for you. You don’t always know what is right for you. If you’re breaking down over something, it wasn’t working for you and holding onto something that isn’t working, only keeps you trapped. Letting it go and letting it subsequently break you down is what will inevitably lead you to the breakthrough you’re seeking.

Breakdowns are hard, but the breakthroughs they lead you to are priceless.  Don’t avoid the breakdown, it’s in place to show you that YOU ARE ALMOST THERE. Just when you think it couldn’t get any darker, that’s the moment when the light returns. Don’t run from the breakdown, let it transform you and let it bring on the breakthrough you’ve been waiting for all along.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… gives you ultimate power over your life.

Had we been taught the true power of our minds, we’d understand the power we have over our lives. After all, we’re always in full control of our lives; our lives are NEVER in control of us.

The way it works is very simple…  our thoughts govern our experiences, so in essence, we get what we think about whether we want it or not. Negative, fear-based thoughts provide negative/unfulfilling outcomes whereas positive, empowering thoughts can only manifest positive/successful outcomes. But no one ever teaches us that. No one teaches us that if we learn to control our mind, we will be better able to control the outcomes in our lives. 

In reality, we end up spending needless energy suffocating under worry, anxiety and dread only to find out that by doing so, we’ve inadvertently harnessed the power of those negative emotions and succeeded in activating them in our lives. “What, I brought this on? How could I possibly do that? It wasn’t me. All of this is happening to me, certainly not by me.” 

Newsflash… nothing is happening to you. You are co-creating every step of your life with every thought you think. And the powerful thing to note here is that you are the thinker of your thoughts, YOUR THOUGHTS ARE NOT THINKING YOU. Subsequently, you are in control of your thoughts and your thoughts are ultimately what create your reality.

You are more powerful then you realize. Your thoughts create your reality so if your thoughts are not making you happy, CHANGE THEM UNTIL THEY DO and then watch your life deliver every happy experience to you. It can be no other way.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… will only disappoint you.

We all have our own baseline expectations of how people should behave in given situations BUT expecting people to uphold those expectations is both unrealistic and unfair to everyone.

It’s ok to have high standards for personal decorum, but it’s not ok to put those standards on others.

Putting those standards on others sets them up to fail and sets you up to be disappointed. Let people be who they are and IF WHO THEY ARE DOESN’T WORK FOR YOU – MAKE ANOTHER DECISION, but don’t waste one moment hoping/expecting they’ll show up differently.

Expecting people to be other than who they are is a game you’ll NEVER win. It only sets you up for disappointment when they don’t come through. Recognize that you can’t fix people and you can’t change them, but you can learn to accept them for who they are and LET THEM OFF THE HOOK for everything they cannot be for you. 

People are messy and they come with their own limitations. Don’t get caught up in those limitations – they’ll only frustrate you. Remember that it isn’t your job to hold up a mirror to their lack of self-awareness. If they cannot see themselves, there isn’t anyway you’re going to be able to show them who they are.

Learn to know the cards you are holding – learn to know the person who is sitting right across from you and NEVER EXPECT THEM TO BE OTHER THAN WHO THEY ARE and you’ll never be disappointed.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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… grats you more.

When you’re grateful for what you have, you’re rewarded with more of it. This is because your attention to the positive aspects of life draw onto you more of the same.

But nobody teaches us that.

We’re so goal oriented that the focus tends to stay on what we do not have rather than relish what we do have, and subsequently because our focus is on the lack of what we desire, we only succeed in creating more of it. 

You can’t get to what you want by focusing on what you don’t. Learn to practice gratitude for what you have and it’ll continue to bring more of the same. Like attracts like — happy and fulfilled always brings more happiness and fulfillment. How could it not?

Take back control over your thoughts. Focusing on what you don’t have doesn’t bring it quicker. It only keeps it from you. 

By practicing gratitude, it’ll grat you even more than you desire. It’s not about NOT having what you want, it’s about being grateful for what you have. 

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… they NEVER stay the same.

Why do we think that making a commitment means forever? Our universe is in a constant state of flux — everything changes, nothing remains static.

We, ourselves are continuously growing and changing and our commitments must reflect that evolution if they’re to remain relevant and supportive of our needs. 

Commitments should be fluid — they should never drown you. They should ebb and flow and morph with you. Anything that confines you suppresses your creativity; anything that moves with you gives you new life.

You’re never stuck in a commitment. If it’s a healthy commitment, it knows how to evolve with you.

So go ahead, make a commitment — any commitment, it doesn’t matter which commitment you make because in reality, you can never make a mistake. Commitments evolve and commitments bring you deeper into your experience. They help you to know better what is right/wrong for you. So pick a direction and commit to it. And if a commitment is no longer serving you and no longer evolving with your needs, re-think it. That’s life. No one commitment can serve you forever.

Your life is a foundation of commitments — in order to get somewhere, you have to start some place, so commit to it. For your life path to evolve, you have to first get onto one. Make that commitment, go deeper into your experience and the rest of your life will naturally unfold.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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… where else would you go?

We all have our personal issues and they always seem to show up through the dance of relationship.

We are very quick to identify other people’s issues, but not as quick to identify our own.

When a breakdown in relationship occurs, there’s a natural tendency to blame and point fingers. But that’s the easy way out. In reality, it takes 2 to tango; issues are seldom one-sided. Learn to own what’s yours and give the rest back. 

You can jump out of a relationship when problems occur, but they’ll just follow you onto the next relationship because wherever you go, you take yourself with you. You pack up all your issues, sling them over your shoulder and bring them forward into the next relationship.

Our bags are pretty full and they’re weighing us down. Wouldn’t it be easier to unpack them, go through them and separate the dirty laundry from the clean? It’s more discreet and constructive to store our baggage in our new partner’s guest closet than it is to explode our dirty laundry all over their front foyer.

Do your work. Own what’s yours and give the rest back. No one is responsible for healing you. You can run from your problems, but you can’t run from yourself. It’ll just be a matter of time before you get caught.

Wherever you go, you take yourself with you. Life can be a long and exhaustive journey. Better to travel light and learn to check your emotions. 

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… take LONGER in the end.

There are no shortcuts to your own life experience.

Life builds onto itself everyday with every new experience and EVERY NEW EXPERIENCE IS NEEDED TO MOVE ONTO THE NEXT PHASE OF YOUR LIFE. 

Your life is a step-by-step amalgamation of your experiences, so if you don’t explore the wisdom of the phase you’re currently in, YOU’LL NEVER MOVE ON IN YOUR LIFE.

Don’t try to shortchange yourself by taking a shortcut, it’ll just leave you empty-handed and stuck in the same place. If you’re not moving forward in your life, ask yourself if you’ve sufficiently cleaned out your emotional attic? Every experience we have comes with its own attic we’d rather not open.

Think about it, you can’t renovate your upstairs if you still haven’t cleaned out your attic. If you don’t learn from and let go of old experiences, how can you move forward and build a new living situation for yourself? You can’t.

Shortcuts may seem like a great idea in the short run, but in the long run they leave you at a dead-end. Don’t look for the easy way out. The easy way out is just that — EASY, it’s NEVER better. 

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER,click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook. 

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

 

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