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Archive for the ‘Believe in Yourself’ Category

is about controlling your thoughts, NOT your actions.

Those of us who want to feel in control usually default to controlling our actions in the hopes of controlling an outcome. But there’s a better way to get the outcome you desire…

Start at the beginning — learn to control your thoughts FIRST because your thoughts create your perceptions and your perceptions create your reality.

Nothing will manifest through action if it’s not supported by a thought that’s aligned with it. In other words, if you think one thing but try and use action to create something else, it’ll never work. For example, have you ever tried to succeed in a business venture, yet didn’t believe in yourself that you could succeed? That’s a perfect example.

If your action doesn’t support what you think about it, it’ll never happen. There’s no amount of action that will overcome your thought about the situation. It doesn’t matter what you do, what matters is what you think about it.

Don’t fight yourself — if you want to control something, control something that’ll make a difference in your life. Don’t waste your time trying to control something physically through your actions and yet undue yourself mentally through your thoughts.

Do you want to be in control of your life? Learn to control the right things. Control your thoughts and it’ll control everything else.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

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… is a step closer towards success.

But we were never taught that.

We view failure as a setback, but in reality “failure” is NOT a setback, but a necessary “step-BACK” along our path towards success. Sometimes it’s necessary to step back in life to regroup and re-calibrate so that we can move forward in a stronger, more definitive way.

It’s important to understand that success is very rarely a steady trajectory upwards. By it’s definition, it’s frought with many step-backs — it has to be. After all, if you didn’t know failure, how could you ever really come to know success?

Our lives are about taking 1-step forward, 2-steps back and it’s the steps-back that enable us to “re-trace” our steps in order to do things better next time. The steps back allow you to process the wisdom you’ve already garnered and make some new decisions with it.

Failure is never falling short of your goal — it’s part of the process it takes to get there. When you learn what doesn’t work, you begin to understand more about what will work. Rejoice in your failures, they innately set you up onto a more solid foundation moving forward. The only way to get to the next highest mountain top is to come down the side of the mountain you’re on. Don’t fight the downhill slide, use that experience to go higher up the next mountain.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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… it’s how quickly you can catch yourself.

We all fall. The cycle of life has many ups and downs. After all, what goes up must come down. Falling down isn’t the issue — learning to land more gracefully is.

How do you weather your falls? Do you crash and burn? Or do you catch yourself so you do not go down in flames? We innately understand how to catch ourselves when we trip over a curb, but we somehow get tripped up over our falls in life.

Falling isn’t the issue, it’s what we do once we fall that determines where we will end up. Are you adept at catching yourself and making it look like a seamless step or do you allow that stumble to bring you to your knees in tears for everyone to see.

Falling doesn’t have to mean falling apart. It can also mean falling into something new. Don’t buy into the drama of the fall, pretend that it was an intentional measure to showcase your strength and fortitude. What doesn’t kill you will always make you stronger as long as you manage to get up off the floor and keep moving.

Don’t get tripped up over the fall. Learn how to make a dance out of it. Be easy with yourself. Be light. And the next time you fall, it will not take you out; it will only make you laugh.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

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… keeps you both in darkness.

Why not learn to throw down a ladder instead?

There is a difference between trying to help someone and losing yourself in the process.

You can’t change people. You can’t fix people. You can’t drag people to a better version of themselves. They have to want to meet you there or they will never get there.

You can’t do the work for people. Giving them all the answers doesn’t help them to learn how to crawl out of the hole themselves. What happens the next time they fall in again?

Show them there is a better way to live. Throw them down a ladder and encourage them to climb out themselves. Lead by example. Stay out in the sunshine and entice them out of their darkness. But stay away from the edge, you might just fall in. If you try to do their work for them, you’ll both end up in the hole and then you won’t be of any use to them.

If you really want to help people, teach them how to work their way back up to the light. Give them the tools to help them climb out on their own and welcome them out into the sunshine. It’s a win-win for both of you.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

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… doesn’t MAKE it work.

It just exhausts you.

There is only so much you can do to make a situation or a relationship work. At some point you have to be willing to walk away from it if it is not meeting your needs. In other words, you have to learn WHEN to walk away from what is NOT working, so you can free up the space to find what will.

You can’t repeatedly look at what’s not working and resent it for not being different.

It’s not others’ fault for not meeting your needs, it’s your fault for allowing them to continually disappoint you.

Don’t look to change others. Look to change yourself. If you are not getting your needs met, look somewhere else. Don’t make someone responsible for your happiness, take charge of it yourself.

Holding on to what doesn’t work, doesn’t make it work. It just breaks you down and takes your power away from you. Love yourself enough to ask for better and you just might get it.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

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… only brings you more of it.

When our thoughts are focused on a person or a situation that is upsetting to us, we continue to attract more of the same.

You get what you think about whether you want it or not, so if there is something in your life that is not working/not making you happy, do not feed it any attention. Take your focus off of it and put it into something that feels slightly better. And if nothing feels better, make it up — even better.

Your thoughts fuel your experiences. So if your thoughts are not what you want to be experiencing, stop them in their tracks before they gain momentum and start manifesting in your life. You are in control of your life. Your thoughts are NOT in control of you. You are the thinker, learn to change the thoughts that create your future.

The road to your future is paved by the thoughts you are thinking in this moment. You can’t get to a better life by focusing on what is wrong with this one. You can only get a better life by visualizing a better scenario for yourself.

Focusing on what you don’t want, only brings you more of it. If you want something different, think a different thought and watch how it magically manifests in your life.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

 

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… walk away with love.

ALWAYS with love.

Our lives consist of many different types of relationships, but not every one of those relationships is meant to be in your life forever. And even those that are, seldom make it there, unfortunately.

Not everyone will understand you and support who you are. Not everyone will appreciate you and not take you for granted. Not everyone will make time for you. Not everyone will be able to communicate with you. Not everyone will recognize the beauty in your relationship until it’s too late. And certainly not everyone will recognize what they have lost until they have truly lost it. That’s generally how it works.

And some people NEVER learn but remain comfortable in their patterns — forever blaming their patterns for why they cannot move forward. And forever repeating those patterns in hopes that one day they find the “magic person” who can fix it for them. But that never works.

Relationships aren’t important for where they bring you to, they are only important for how they have changed you.

If people you are involved with cannot see the value of what you bring to the table, then they do not get to have you.

But love them anyway.

Love them because they taught you so much about yourself. Love them because they helped shape your heart and open your mind. Love them because they unveiled your hidden pain and your fears so you could work on them. Love them because they taught you what you do and DO NOT want to experience in a relationship. Love them because it is that love that will transform you. And finally love them, because if you don’t, you will just carry the scars of that hurt forward into your next relationship. And you deserve better than that.

When people can’t appreciate what they have in you, don’t fight them, quietly disappear from their lives, and take that love with you. When you leave with love, you leave with all the learning that made you BETTER. You are the one who wins. Let that love transform you on your path forward and happily open you up to a new tomorrow.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Book, “Life Lessons,” click here.

Read more inspiration in Donnalynn’s Weekly Column at the NY OBSERVER, click here.

Follow Donnalynn on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook.

If you would like more information on Life Coaching Sessions with Donnalynnclick here.

If you would like to schedule a session with Donnalynn, click here.

 

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